Couples Therapy
Turn challenges into growth
your partnership is feeling strained, and you want things to shift.
Maybe you’re getting stuck in the same argument cycle over and over, or maybe there was one big blow-up that brought significant issues to the surface. You might be feeling disconnected or drained in the relationship. Or you and your partner might be facing a difficult life experience together that’s added stress to your usual dynamic.
Talking things through with a neutral person can help.
As your couples therapist, I’m not here to take sides or declare who is in the right. I’m here to help you both step back from the situation, look at the underlying issues, and practice new ways of communicating.
After I get the background about what’s bringing you to therapy, I’ll guide both partners in considering how your own past experiences with family, relationships and trauma have shaped your particular emotional triggers.
I’ll support each of you in identifying what you need to self-regulate when you’re emotionally triggered and practicing those skills. Self-regulation is a necessary prerequisite to communication - no issue is getting resolved when both partners are emotionally triggered.
I’ll also help you notice pitfalls to effective communication in your relationship and help you practice ways of communicating that prioritize curiosity and vulnerability.
We may also work on exploring areas where each partner may have unmet needs, and ways that partners differ cognitively and emotionally.
going to couples therapy is an investment in understanding yourself and your partner in a deeper way.
Though it’s likely to help your relationship, the true purpose of couples therapy is not “saving relationships.” It’s helping both of you to understand yourselves and the way you show up in partnership more fully. When you do this work you can make conscious choices to step away from self-protective patterns from the past that are no longer serving you.